Chuck Tingle might have restored my joy of reading.
Publisher's summary for "Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls":
After years of having their natural habitat encroached upon, bigfeet are finally forced to leave the forest and head out into the open ocean. At first, we think that it's the last we’ll ever see of them, until bigfoot piracy becomes rampant across the Seven Seas.
When the most notorious bigfoot pirate, Lorko the Black, is killed off the coast of Santa Monica, a man named Andy begins to feel a mysterious throbbing in his balls. After a trip to the doctor, Andy soon learns that what seemed like a coincidence is actually an acute case of haunted balls, and the only prescription is a bigfoot ghost pirate gangbang!
Now, that piques my interest. Who cares about Merry Christmas, Alex Cross?
